I love that mindfulness has become a bigger thing. I'm basing this on my very unscientific observation that when my mediation practice comes up in conversation, people don't look at me funny. When I suggest that my coaching clients should use mindfulness techniques to improve sales and business performance, they don't think it's an "out there" idea. And many people are excited to share their favorite meditation apps with you. I'm still not sure if it's totally mainstream. But the tools of mindfulness, things like meditation, journaling, or gratitude lists, are becoming much more common in conversation. This is important because … [Read more...]
Us vs. Them vs. Us
I don't write much about politics. Not because the way we engage with each other isn't important. But because my focus has always been on the individual journey. There's so much to be spoken about right now. And so much to be heard. There are powerful words being said and written by others much better suited than me to speak to the realities of not being white and male. I'd rather let those voices speak for themselves and encourage others to listen. I can only offer a private realization I've made in the past that has been useful for me. Our Mind Wants to Create an "Us" When researching an article a few years ago, I came upon … [Read more...]
The Battle In Every Doughnut
I really love doughnuts. And donuts, too. Whether there's an "ugh" or not, I'm a big fan. But no matter how you want to spell them, they're not really that great for you. Sure, the perfect combination of sugar and carbohydrates is good for the soul. But it's not necessarily good for the body. Which means every time I consider popping a doughnut in my mouth, I have an internal debate with myself about whether or not I really need this one. Sometimes I win that debate with myself. Sometimes not. But I've found it's not worth dwelling on it either way, because it's just one small battle in a very long struggle. There is No … [Read more...]
How to Manage the Unintended Downside of Positive Thinking
My wife recently asked me if having Liam was easier or harder than I expected it to be. My response, "It's been really hard, but that's what I had imagined it would be. So I guess the experience lived up to what I thought was coming." Now, don't get me wrong, fatherhood has been a truly transformative experience with many positives. And also a whole heap of challenges. But because I had been warned by friends, family, and shell-shocked new parents, I was prepared. (Prepared doesn't mean ready. Because you definitely can't be ready. But at least I wasn't surprised when I felt like I was way over my head). Setting Ourselves Up for … [Read more...]
What Matters Most? HOW You Do What You Do
If I had to sum up the philosophy that influences my coaching, speaking, and writing in one sentence... I don't think I could do it. But one idea that would be prominent: "Having a good process is important, but it's how you engage with that process on a human level that determines the outcome." Or to put it in another, geekier, way: "Systems and processes are necessary for success, but not sufficient in and of themselves". Life Gets in the Way This thought was spurred by my wall calendar that I use to guide and motivate my daily writing. Actually, the thought was spurred by the massive amount of blank days on my wall calendar … [Read more...]
Seeing Time Come and Go
"Kids grow up so fast!" It's a cliché that is so true It's been amazing and humbling to watch my son grow and change in his first few months. His body has gotten bigger, there's hair on his head, and the way he engages with the world evolves daily. (Based on frequency, he seems pretty excited to have the hand-eye coordination to put his entire fist in his mouth). But even seeing someone else's child at intervals can be shocking when you realize how much they've changed since the last time you saw them. Watching the Effects of Time Time is easy to waste because we can't see it. It's not in a jar on the shelf that is slowly … [Read more...]
Being Mighty On a Daily Basis
On a sweltering day in July 1997, I went with my friend Joe to see the Mighty Mighty Bosstones play at the Eagles Ballroom in Milwaukee. And on a sweltering night in August 2019, I took my wife to see the Mighty Mighty Bosstones play at the Eagles Ballroom in Milwaukee. For those 22 years and more they've been my favorite band, but I'm not here to proselytize to you. (Although I think it's worth checking out their back catalog for sure). Instead, I want to share what stood out about their recent show in August: They kicked ass. Keep Doing It Because That's What You Do It's easy to romanticize the past because our memory can get … [Read more...]
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